Sarsfields Newsletter

November 8, 2018

THE SASH Friday July 16th 2010


The Weekly Online Newsletter of Sarsfields GAA Club.     




SFL Division 5 Sarsfields 3-12 Moorefield 1-7


By Tony Ryan

In this SFL Division 5 local derby on Wednesday night week last in Sarsfields Park Sarsfields had a surprisingly easy victory over table toppers Moorefield emerging with a comfortable 11-point victory at the end of a free flowing and sporting encounter. Playing an attractive brand of fast open football with intelligent support play the home side led from start to finish.

Within 30 seconds of the throw in corner forward Niall Flynn had the ball in the Moorfield net after a good pass from half back Fergal Doyle. Within 10 minutes Flynn had a second goal from a penalty after he himself was fouled as he bore down on goal. With 19 minutes gone Moorefield themselves were awarded a penalty that was converted by Mark Murnaghan to cut the deficit to 5 points, 2-4 to 1-2. This however was as good as it got for Moorefield with a Niall Murphy and a Danny Watson point either side of a Glen Collins point for Moorefield leaving them trailing at the break by double scores, 2-6 to 1-3.

After the resumption 3 successive early points from Conor Walsh (2) and Darren Cambell (1) put a serious dent in Moorefield’s hopes of a second half recovery. They did rally briefly though with 2 points in a minute from Glen Collins and Mark Murnaghan but never looked likely to trouble a rampant Sarsfields side that was dominant in all sectors.

 Disaster struck for Moorfield with 10 minutes remaining when the failure to clear a high ball out of defence afforded full forward Darren Cambell, who was foraging at the edge of the square, the opportunity to punch the ball out of Moorefield goalkeeper Conor Galvin’s grasp and into the net to give Sarsfields an unassailable 3-10 to 1-5 lead. Moorefield were left with an insurmountable task of turning the game in their favour and the best that they could manage from here on in was match Sarsfields final 2 points from Niall Murphy and Conor Walsh with 2 of their own, one from James Potts and an excellent long range effort from substitute Adam Tyrell. Sarsfields manager Paddy Cambell will have been pleased with the way his team is shaping up ahead of their championship opener with Johnstownbridge. Sarsfields selector Eric Thorpe was very happy with the performance and commitment of the players. “They’re playing well as a team and with a big panel we have competition for championship places”, said Mr Thorpe.   





Sarsfields: Steven Jacob, Eoin O’Brien, Niall O’ Conner, Paddy Keogh, Fergal Doyle, David Breslin, Niall Murphy (0-2), Kevin Miller, Ciaran McInerney Aspell(0-1), Conor Walsh (0-5), Dean Domican, Danny Watson(0-1) Darren Cambell (1-1), Nigel Flynn (2-2) Subs: Mark Swift for Niall Flynn 52 Mins.


Moorefield: Conor Galvin, Pauric Murphy, Joe Phillips, Alan Dempsey, Steve Martin, Gary Rogan, Steven Murphy, Anthony Durney, Des Rogan (0-1), Daryl Edmonds, James Potts (0-1), Gary Dowling, Gary Lowe, Glen Collins(0-3), Mark Murnaghan(1-1) Subs: Darren Brogan for Pauric Murphy(14mins)Niall O’Shea for Gary Dowling Adam Tyrell(0-1) for Daryl Edmonds(35mins) Kevin Hannify for Gary Lowe(52mins)





SFL Division 5 Sarsfields 1-13 Allenwood 0-5



In the end Sarsfields ran out easy winners in this SFL Division 5 game held in Sarsfields Park last week. The first half was closely contested with Sarsfields leading by just two points, 0-6 to 0-4 at the break. Just 30 seconds after halftime Dean Domician set Sarsfields on their way with a goal after a goalmouth scramble. From there on in Sarsfield were in complete control as the Sarsfields forwards particularly Ciaran McInerney, Ciaran Miller, Danny Watson and Nial Flynn racked up the scores. 




Sarsfields: Steven Jacob, Tom Sex, Niall O’Conner, Paddy Keogh, Fergal Doyle, David Breslin, Dan Doherty, Kevin Miller (0-1), Dean Domican(1-0) Niall Flynn(0-1), Ciaran McInerny-Aspell(0-5), Damian Flynn, Ciaran Miller(0-3)Danny Watson (0-2) Chris Fox. Subs: Cian Sweeney for Tom Sex (inj 27mins) Owen O’Brien for Chris Fox(45mins) Colin Dunning for Dan Doherty(52)


Allenwood: Dara  Fitzgerald, Shane McCarthy, Barry Jacobs, Morgan  Callaghan, Quinten Carew, Stephen Conlon, Ciaran Moore, William Dannagher, Darren Maher, Martin Baneham (0-1), Darren Reddy (0-1), Ian Glennan(0-2) Shane Smullen, Bernard McNally, Shane Crowe(0-1) 


Leinster GAA News
USA Beckons for Enniskillen Cross Community Team
A cross community Gaelic Football team from Enniskillen, who are preparing for a trip of a lifetime to Long Island in New York to compete in the U16 Continental Youth Championships later this month, was today honoured at Croke Park by GAA Director General Páraic Duffy and Ulster GAA President Aogán Ó Fearghail.

The panel of 20 is made up of players from four schools in Enniskillen, namely Erne Integrated, St Joseph’s, St Michael’s and Royal Portora. The team was formed earlier this year as part of Ulster GAA’s Outreach Project ‘The Cúchulainn Cup’ – which brings together young men from different backgrounds to participate in Gaelic Games. All the boys had little or no experience playing Gaelic Football before getting involved with the team. Since then they have made massive strides after receiving months of expert coaching from Ulster GAA’s finest coaches.

The Enniskillen Cúchulainn side are now ready to compete with Gaelic teams from across the globe in the Continental Youth Championships. Speaking ahead of the American Trip, Ulster GAA President Aogán Ó Fearghail said, ‘The Cúchulainn Initiative is Ulster GAA’s flagship outreach project which aims to promote Gaelic Games to those from non-GAA backgrounds while at the same time helping to break down barriers and promote good relations among young people.

‘We are very proud of this programme and are pleased that it is being so well received by schools in both the controlled and maintained sectors. I take this opportunity to commend all those who participated in this year’s Cúchulainn Initiative – we never underestimate the major step it has been for many of these boys, their families and their schools to get involved in this project. Each of them has played their part to show that sport can really break down barriers.

‘Unfortunately we can only send over one team to compete at the Continental Youth Championships in America – and this year that honour falls on the Enniskillen side.

‘I have no doubt that these boys are about to embark on a trip of a lifetime, where they will experience the joys of playing Gaelic Games in the Long Island sun, see the bright lights and sights of New York City and most importantly where they will hopefully make lifelong friendships with their teammates.’

GAA Ard Stiúrthóir Páraic Duffy wished the competing Enniskillen team every success in their upcoming campaign and lauded the work of the Ulster Council with this initiative.

He said: ‘It’s hugely encouraging to see how these players have taken to Gaelic football and the plans and hopes they now harbour ahead of the CYC Games in New York.

‘It should be an experience to savour and one that has the potential to help forge friendships and bonds that will last for many years to come.

‘Credit is due to the Ulster Council for their steadfast commitment to this project and the other work that they are engaged in this area and I laud their coaches and officers as well as the players and their families who have embraced the importance of the concept right from the beginning. I hope this commitment is reflected on the field of play in Long Island.’


Club Membership Discount Scheme


Sarsfields members can avail of a 10% discount when they show their membership cards while shopping at the following businesses that are participants of the Club Membership Discount Card Scheme.

Acupuncture and Sports Therapy – Gerry Loftus 16 lower Eyre Street.

Amazon Beauty Salon, Ballymany Shopping Centre, Newbridge

An Chistin Restaurant, George’s St, Newbridge

Attic Storage, Industrial Estate, Newbridge.

Biodental Dental Laboratory, Middle Eyre Street

Blooms Florist, Henry Street , Newbridger

Champions Sports, Whitewater, Shopping Centre

Chat & Chew , Café Edward St. Newbridge.

Chicken America Restaurant, Edward St Newbridge.

Clarke’s Menswear, Edward St, Newbridge

Cosgorve’s Pharmacy., Edward Sy Newbridge.

Curraghr Race Course.

Ecocraft, Environmental Building, Clongorey, Newbridge.

Edward Harrigans, pub and Restaurant. Main Street.

Enigma Design Homeware & Gifts, Tarmel Centre

Fallons Bar & Café Main Street, Kilcullen

Farrell & Nephew Gift & Bookshop, Main Street, Newbridge.

Fitzsimons Finance, Cutlery Road, Newbridge.

Hokey Pokey Café, Charlotte Street, Newbridge.

Jardin Royale , Chinese Restaurant, Main Street, Newbridge

Jean’s Jewellers  & Giftware, Henry Stret.

Joe Kelly Barber, George’s Street.

Kildare Tyres & Batteries, Cutlery Road, Newbridge.

LHW Insurances Group, 57/58/George’s Street Dun Laoghaire.

Lilywhite Print, Eyre Street, Newbridge.

Maginn Electrical, Curragh Camp.

Marty’s Cabs, Main Street Newbridge.

Michael Murphy Furniture, Edward Street, Newbridge.

Moores Builders Providers, Cutlery Road.

Newbridge Hire Service, Newbridge Industrial Estate.

Newbridge Van Rental, Newhall, Naas.

Newbridge Nutrition, Eyre Street.

O’Leary Shoes, Dunnes Stores, Newbridge

O’Reilly Pharmacy, Curragh Grange, Newbridge.

Owen Baker, Menswear, Charlotte Street, Newbridge.

Paul’s Riverside Restaurant, Market Square, Kilcullen.

Red Lane Driving Range, Red Lane , Newbridge.

Reflections Boutique, Moorefield Road, Newbridge.

Riozzi’s Take Away, Eyre Street.

Robbie’s Butchers, Highfield, Newbridge.

Sheehy Motors, Newbridge Road, Naas.

Stevenson’s Home Décor, Ballymany Shoppinf Centre, Newbridge.

Swift’s Bar  and Restaurant, Main Street, Newbridge.

Tarmel Laundry & Dry Cleaners, Cutlery Road, Newbridge.

The Fabric Library, Kildaara Industrial Estate, Newbridge.

The Good Food Gallery, Carnalway, Kilcullen.

The Kiosk Florists, Main Street, Newbridge.

Tom Malone Butchers, Charlotte Street, Newbridge

Top Twenty, Dunnes Stores Shopping Centre.

WE Fit Tyre & Exhaust Centre, Newbridge Industrial Estate.

Whitewater Café Club, Edward Street, Newbridge.

Whyte Melia Electrical, 882, Piercetown, Newbridge.








Sarsfields Fixtures This Week.


Sarsfields Fixtures
Tuesday 13th July                                  
Senior Football League Div 3                     7.30pm
Sarsfields v Celbridge                               Pitch 1
Ladies Senior Football League                    7.15pm
Sarsfields v Maynooth                             Pitch 3
Wednesday 14th July                              
Under 11 Boys Football Challenge               7pm
Sarsfields v Portlaoise                              Pitch 3
Friday 16th July                                    
Under 16 Boys Football Championship         7.30pm
Kilcock v Sarsfields                                 Away
Sunday 18th July                                    
Senior Football League Div 1                     3pm
Sarsfields v Moorefield                             Pitch 1
Monday 19th July                                  
Intermediate Camogie League Semi Final     7pm
Sarsfields v Rathcoffey                             Pitch 3
Minor Boys Football Championship             7.30pm
Sarsfields (A) v Athy                              Kilcullen
Sarsfields (B) v Rathangan                      R.Towers


The Sash Relaunched

The recently re launched Sash Magazine is now on sale in the clubhouse, O’Conner’s Centra, Johnstons and Buckleys’s  in Allenview Heights. In order to avoid having advertisements in the magazine there is a €2 charge to cover production costs.  It will be published quarterly and the next issue will be in mid July after the All Ireland Feile. Contributions are most welcome from any section of the club or individual. Please send articles to PRO


 Sasrsfields On Facebook 

Sarsfields now have 415 Fans on Facebook.

Sarsfields now has a Facebook Page where all sections can now post information directly relating to games, results events and photos etc. In addition there is a discussion forum. Link to Sarsfields  Facebook page can be found by scrolling down the home page of the Sarsfields website or by Googling Sarsfields GAA Facebook.




Support The Sash with Vodafone

Sign up to the Vodafone Support Your GAA Club programme to donate 5% of
your Pay Monthly bill or Top Up to Sarsfields – without it costing you a
single cent! Contact Shane Campbell or visit the Vodafone web site.

More Stupid Quotes.  


New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season, ‘I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first.’

Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh, ‘I’m going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.’

‘Shaquille O’Neal [basketball] on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece
, ‘I can’t really remember the names of the clubs that we went to.’

Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach,
‘You guys line up alphabetically by height.’ And ‘You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle.’

Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota,
‘He’s a guy who gets up at six o’clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.’

Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice,
‘My sister’s expecting a baby, and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt.’

Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former player
, ‘I told him, ‘Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?’ He said, ‘Coach, I don’t know and I don’t care.’

Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins,
‘He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings.’

Oiler coach, Bum Phillips, when asked by Bob Cost why he takes his wife on all road trips, Phillips responded, ‘Because she is too dang ugly to kiss good-bye!’


‘I find it funny to watch people patronize me or think I’m
dumb because I’m blonde and young. I know I have a higher
IQ than 99% of the brunettes out there.’
– Hayden Panettiere, being a little egotistical.


‘If I saw an alien, I’d tell it to screw off because
whatever planet he came from they wouldn’t have The Beatles
or any decent music.’
– Liam Gallagher (Oasis)


‘Do you still throw spears at each other?’
  idiot Prince Philip (to an Aboriginal businessman in    
  traditional dress)


‘I find it a bit sad that there is no photo of me hanging on
the walls in the Berlin Museum at Checkpoint Charlie.’
– Actor David Hasselhoff


Odd/Strange/Bizarre Story’s 

What a Croc


PERTH, Australia – A man thrown out of a pub in Australia
broke into a zoo and climbed onto the back of a crocodile
named Fatso, which bit him on the leg but then let him go.
Police said they’re surprised the croc didn’t inflict worse
damage. The 36-year-old man, who police said had just been
thrown out of a pub for being drunk, told officials he
scaled the barbed wire fence surrounding the Broome
Crocodile Park in remote northwest Australia on Monday night
because he wanted to give the 16-foot Fatso a pat.

‘He has attempted to sit on its back and the croc has taken
offense to that and has spun around and bit him on the right
leg,’ Broome Police Sgt. Roger Haynes said.

The saltwater crocodile then inexplicably let the man go,
and he climbed back over the fence to safety, police said.

The man, who was a tourist from eastern Australia and whose
name was not released, suffered some ‘very nasty
lacerations’ and was taken to a hospital, Haynes said.

‘Saltwater crocodiles … once they get hold of you, are not
renowned for letting you go,’ Haynes said. ‘He’s lucky to
have escaped with his life.’




True Story


Fished Off

BROOKLYN PARK, Minnesota. – Eight-year-old Logan Fisher is fed up
with crime. And he’s making sure the leaders of his
Minnesota city know it.

Logan was ticked because thieves broke into his Brooklyn
Park home last month and stole thousands of dollars worth of
electronics, not to mention his wallet filled with quarters.

So the soon-to-be fourth-grader climbed a stool and took the
podium at this week’s City Council meeting. The Star Tribune
reports he wrote out his speech in pencil, then had his mom
type it up.

He said, ‘We need to get mean and we need to mean it.’

Deputy Police Chief Craig Enevoldsen agreed with Logan on
neighbors watching out for neighbors and stepped up police
patrols. But he said the boy’s idea to put an armored SWAT
vehicle on the streets to scare criminals away wasn’t so




True Story 2




Spare Seat

A guy named Joe receives a free ticket to the SuperBowl from
his company. Unfortunately, when Joe arrives at the stadium,
he realizes the seat is in the last row in the corner of the
stadium, he’s closer to the Goodyear Blimp than the field.
About halfway through the first quarter, Joe sees through
his binoculars an empty seat 10 rows off the field right on
the 50 yardline.

He decides to take a chance and makes his way through the
stadium and around the security guards to the empty seat. As
he sits down, Joe asks the gentleman sitting next to him,
‘Excuse me, is anyone sitting here?’

The man says ‘No.’

Now, very excited to be in such a great seat for the game,
Joe again inquires of the man next to him, ‘This is
incredible! Who in their right mind would have a seat like
this at the SuperBowl and not use it?!’

The man replies, ‘Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I
was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This
is the first SuperBowl we haven’t been together at since we
got married in 1967.’

‘Well, that’s really sad,’ said Joe, ‘but still, you
couldn’t find anyone to take the seat? A friend or close
relative?’ ‘No,’ the man replies, ‘They’re all at the


Little Johnny’s Brother

Little Johnny’s new baby brother was screaming up a storm.
He asked his mom, ‘Where’d we get him?’

His mother replied, ‘He came from heaven, Johnny.’

Johnny says, ‘WOW! I can see why they threw him out!’ 




It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale (and some
advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for the
long line that formed in front of the store by 8:30AM, the
store’s opening time.

A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to
be pushed back, amid loud and colorful curses. On the man’s
second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw and knocked
around a bit and then thrown to the end of the line again.

As he got up the second time, he complained to the person at
the end of the line, ‘That does it! If they hit me one more
time, I’m not opening the store!’


The Perfect Husband

A man walked out to the street and caught a taxi just going by. He got into the taxi

and the cabbie said, ‘Perfect timing. You’re just like ‘Brian!

Passenger: ‘Who?’

Cabbie: ‘Brian Sullivan. He’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my

coming along when you needed a cab, things happen like that to Brian Sullivan,

every single time.’

Passenger: ‘There are always a few clouds over everybody.’

Cabbie: ‘Not Brian Sullivan. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand

Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and

danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was

an amazing guy.’

Passenger: ‘Sounds like he was something really special.’

Cabbie: ‘There’s more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with.

He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But

Brian Sullivan, he could do everything right.’

Passenger: ‘Wow. Some guy then.’

Cabbie: ‘He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not

like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Brian, he never made a mistake, and

he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer

her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes

highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could

ever measure up to Brian Sullivan.’

Passenger: ‘An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?’

Cabbie: ‘Well, I never actually met Brian. He died. I’m married to his ef*in widow’


Inner Peace – this really works!

I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me today, and we all could probably use more calm in
our lives.

Some doctor on television this morning said that the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started.  

So I looked around my house to see things I’d started and hadn’t finished and, before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Chardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, a pockage of Prunglies, tha mainder of bot Prozic and Valum scriptins, the res of the Chesescke an a box a choclets.
Yu haf no idr how bludy guod I feel rite now.

Plaese sned dhis orn to dem yu fee ar in ned ov iennr paece.


These are classified ads, which were actually placed in a  British newspaper:

8 years old.
Hateful little bastard.

1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbour’s dog.
Mother, a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd.
Father, Super Dog… able to leap tall fences in a single bound.
Also 1 gay bull for sale.
Must sell washer and dryer £100.
Worn once by mistake.
Call Stephanie.

*** And the WINNER is… ***

Complete set of Encyclopaedia Britannica,
45 volumes.
Excellent condition…..£200 or best offer.
No longer needed; got married last month.
Wife knows f#%#%#g everything!







Thanks to Leo Kennedy for the above three.