Sarsfields Newsletter

November 8, 2018

THE SASH Friday October 30th 2009


The Weekly Online Newsletter of Sarsfields GAA Club.    


Junior C Reunion. 


Congratulations to the champions and league double winning  Senior B team who have made it to their third successive final this year having qualified for the Jack Higgins cup after they easily overcame hosts Naas 1-12 to 0-3 on Saturday last. They will now meet Straffan in the final. The U21 footballers will open their Championship campaign against Leixlip in Clane this weekend. See fixtures for times and date.

A hugely enjoyable reunion of the 1984 Junior C Championship winning team in conjunction with a celebration for the 2009 Junior C champions who won the title recently against St. Kevin’s was held in the clubhouse on Saturday night last. Providing a direct link between the two teams were John Holden who was captain of the 1984 team and is also Manager of the 2009 team and Seamus O’Neill another star of the 1984 team is one of his selectors. The 1984 management team of Pat Cox, manager and his selectors Rod O’Sullivan and Tom Browne were honored on the night. All of the panel received a framed photo taken prior to the 1984 final. Mick Buckley father of Niall and the late Michael Gerard Buckley who starred on the 1984 team was presented with a trophy in recognition Michael Gerard’s achievement in being the only Sarsfields player ever in Sarsfields history to have won six championships with all Sarsfields adult teams. Michael Gerard won Junior C, senior B, U21, Jack Higgins cup and minor and senior on the same day, a record in itself.    

Many thanks to all who worked hard to make the night the success it was including organizer and MC on the night John Holden, Michael Ward, Seamus O’Neill and Eric Thorpe. Thanks also to Celine and the bar staff and for the excellent food provided by the caterers Joe and Dave sponsors of our Junior hurling 2009 championship winning team. Eric Thorpe is now also known as Sean Kavanagh after he was presented with his footballer of the year award.


Note from Club Secretary Tony McConnell


Well done to the senior ‘B’s on reaching the final of the Jack Higgins cup
with a comprehensive victory over Naas on a scoreline of 01-12 to 00-03.

The U/21’s play the first round of the championship this Sunday the 1st of
November at 2pm in Clane V Leixlip.

Attached details of the coaching course taking place this Saturday the 31st
in Clane, ran similar course  2 years ago v. good.

Well done to all involved in organising and running the U/13 girls Blitz on
Saturday, some excellent football played in
terrible conditions. Congratulations to the overall winners Ballyboden St
Enda’s of Dublin.

Hard luck to the U/13 boys who lost out to Athy in the U/13 league final on
Saturday in Two Mile House.

Support Sarsfields GAA Club with Vodafone Ireland Sign up to the Vodafone
Support your GAA Club programme to *donate 5% of your Pay Monthly bill or
Top Up to Sarsfields – without it costing you a single cent!*

Thanks Tony


Leinster GAA News
Traumatic day had a profound impact

125 YEARS OF GAA : In our series of articles from the GAA Museum, ‘Bloody Sunday’ is recalled, the day on which 14 people in Croke Park were killed by British forces, including Tipperary player Michael Hogan, after whom the Hogan Stand is named

THE DUBLIN football team was scheduled to play Tipperary, in Croke Park, on November 21st 1920; the proceeds of this ‘great challenge match’ to be donated to the Irish Republican Prisoners Fund.

The night before Michael Collins sent his ‘Squad’ out to assassinate the ‘Cairo Gang’- a team of undercover British agents working and living in Dublin. A series of shootings took place throughout the night which left 14 members of the British Forces dead.

The Crown Forces, led by the Auxiliaries (and supported by the ‘Black and Tans’) mobilised in Dublin on the morning of the match with orders to go to Croke Park and search the crowd for known gunmen and weapons.

Throw-in for the match was scheduled for 2.45pm but when three IRA men, Seán Russell, Tom Kilcoyne and Harry Colley, were informed (by their contacts) of the planned search of Croke Park they came to Croke Park and pleaded with Luke O’Toole, GAA general secretary, to cancel the match.

O’Toole took the decision not to cancel the match; the mood in Dublin, and the stadium, was very tense, rumours of the previous night’s exploits were circulating among the crowd and thoughts of reprisals must have been prominent in peoples’ minds.

O’Toole judged that any announcement to clear the stadium would lead to a panic-induced exodus among the 10,000 strong crowd and that a crush could develop at the turnstiles.

Mick Sammon, the Kildare referee, threw in the ball at 3.15pm.

Accounts given by eye-witnesses suggest that five minutes after the throw-in the stadium was raided by the British forces with the shooting breaking out almost immediately.

The British had entered the stadium at the Canal End and when the shooting began the crowd surged away from that end of the stadium hoping to make it over the wall at the railway end of the stadium.

Ultimately 14 people lost their lives as a result of the shooting in Croke Park that day.

Included in the dead were Michael Hogan, a player on the Tipperary team (after whom the Hogan Stand is named); Thomas Ryan, shot on his knees whispering an act of contrition to Hogan; Jane Boyle, due to be married five days later and 14-year-old William Scott, so badly mutilated that it was at first thought he had been bayoneted to death.

Two military inquiries were established into the shootings and the findings of these, made public in 2003, are the main primary source for the events of that day.

Strangely the main historical records of the Association, (the Central Council minute books), make no reference whatsoever to Bloody Sunday.

The findings of the military inquiry and the statements released by Dublin Castle often contradict one another.

In a series of ‘official statements’ the British authorities offered three possible scenarios for the bloodshed; the first being that the raiding party returned fire at IRA pickets placed outside Croke Park; the second being that the raiding party came under fire in the ground itself while the third explanation was that, upon the raiding party’s arrival, three warning shots were fired by an IRA man in the crowd and this caused a stampede.

In all Dublin Castle scenarios however one thing is constant, the British had come under fire first.

Almost immediately serious doubts were expressed about the official version of events; the media picked glaring holes in the Dublin Castle statements; in particular their claims about IRA pickets outside the ground, were these not unofficial ticket sellers, a common match-day feature.

One claim made by Dublin Castle, that 30 revolvers had been found in the stadium, caused particular annoyance among the public and the media who begged the question; if 30 arms were found why were they not presented to the inquiry and why was no-one arrested when found with a gun. The purported aim of the raid was, after all, to search for guns and gunmen.

The events of the day had a profound impact on the people of Ireland; it seemed as if the British authorities had deliberately chosen an easy target – a stadium full of innocent people – to exact revenge for the severe military loss suffered the night before the game.

Bloody Sunday shocked the British public too and while it is too simple to say that it helped end the War of Independence it must certainly be considered a key factor.


The GAA Museum – Celebrating 125 years of GAA History


November at the GAA Museum begins on Sunday 1st with a daylong celebration of the founding of the GAA at that fateful meeting in Hayes’ Hotel, Thurles 125 years ago. Throughout the day FREE guided tours and museum activities will keep museum visitors entertained. If you would like to celebrate that historic day why not don your GAA jersey and join us!

On Thursday 5th November the museum will stage a very special evening event in conjunction with the GAA Oral History Project focusing on material collected by the project so far. The GAA Oral History Project recently published The GAA – A People’s History which is now available to buy at the GAA Museum.

Bloody Sunday Commemorative Tours


Finally on Sunday 22nd November the museum will remember the events of the Bloody Sunday 1920 on special commemorative tours. This month we have used an image of the Dublin team who played in that ill fated match as our lead archive image.  Something for all the family this month at the GAA Museum! 

Sunday 22nd November 2009 1.30pm and 3.30pm

On the 21st November 1920 events outside of the GAA brought politics into the heart of the Association. The GAA Museum remembers the tragedy of Bloody Sunday with special commemorative guided tours of the Stadium.

Sarsfields Fixtures


This Sunday November1st  the U21 footballers will get their campaign underway against Leixlip in Clane at 2pm.


*Club Fixtures October 26thNovember 2nd *

* Sunday 1st of November*

Under 21 Championship @ 2pm

Sarsfields V Leixlip Clane

Bord Na nOg Fixtures

*Wednesday 28th of October*

*Under 15 League Division 1  @ 7pm*

*Athy V Sarsfields*

*Sunday 1st of November*

*Under 15 League Division 1  @ 11am*

*Sarsfields V Leixlip **Main Pitch***

Ladies Football Fixtures

Sunday 1st of November

Under 13 League semi- Final Division 1  at 11am

Sarsfields V Nurney/Kildangan 3rd Pitch.


Camóg-aerobics is an exciting new programme which has been designed by the
Camogie Association and is available to clubs to roll out around the county.
This programme is for adult ladies in the community who have never played
before and who have a daughter/son playing camogie/hurling with a local
club. The programme consists of the basic skills of the game combined with
aerobic fitness work.
     Camog-aerobics runs for 6 weeks and the overall aim by the end of the programme is that you will have recruited new mentors for teams or at least
signed up some new social members to your club.  If you don’t recruit new
mentors don’t worry you may have indirectly helped that mothers daughter and
her own development in the game in that her mother might pick up a hurley
and puck around with her in the local park? In other words all is not lost
if they don’t sign up for the club.  A workshop will be happening in Kildare
to explain how to roll out this programme in your club and make available to
you the 6 weeks of classes in order to roll out the programme.

Please find attached application form for workshop to be held on
Tuesday 3rdNovember at 8pm –
please note it is essential to register so material can be made
available to you and your club on the night to run the programme.  

Eve Talbot

Regional Development Co-Ordinator Dublin/Kildare

More Stupid Quotes.   


‘Reports that say that something hasn’t happened are always
interesting to me, because as we know, there are known knowns;
there are things we know we know. We also know there are known
unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not
know. But there are also unknown unknowns, the ones we don’t
know we don’t know.’
– Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld  


‘I was thinking about making a comeback, until I pulled a muscle
Johnny Bench, American something or other.  


‘If I were a single man, I might ask that mummy out. That’s a
good-looking mommy.’
– Bill Clinton


Strange/Bizarre/Quirkie News.


Drunk Driving- in a wheelchair.

A Minnesota man has pleaded guilty to driving
his motorized La-Z-Boy chair while drunk. A criminal complaint
says 62-year-old Dennis LeRoy Anderson told police he left a bar
in the northern Minnesota town of Proctor on his chair after
drinking eight or nine beers.

Prosecutors say Anderson’s blood alcohol content was 0.29, more
than three times the legal limit, when he crashed into a parked
vehicle in August 2008. He was not seriously injured.

Police said the chair was powered by a converted lawnmower and
had a stereo and cup holders.

Sixth Judicial District Judge Heather Sweetland stayed 180 days
of jail time Monday and ordered two years of probation for
Anderson. His attorney, David Keegan, did not immediately return
a call for comment






True Story:   



Solar System Swap
Every 238 years, the orbits of Neptune and Pluto change making
Neptune at times the farthest planet from the sun.

 Anyone who has dabbled in astronomy knows that in our solar
system, there are nine planets that orbit around a single star-
the sun. The outermost of those planets is Pluto. Or is it?

As the only planet that has not been visited by some form of
spacecraft, Pluto’s data is mostly based on other observations
and measurements. The Hubble Space Telescope, as powerful as it
is, can only present us with a somewhat choppy look at the most
prominent feature on the planet’s surface.

What we do know, is that Pluto is relatively small, at
1.27e22kg, which is not as big as the Earth’s moon. At one time
scientists had suspected that either Pluto, which could be

observed visually, although not assessed scientifically, or a
tenth planet was causing unexplained deviations in the movement
of other planets. But as technology advanced, the estimated size
of Pluto showed that would be impossible, and no observations
that would confirm the presence of a tenth planet, have ever
been made.

Normally, Pluto orbits at a distance of 5,913,520,000 km from
the sun. However, an abberhation in that pattern occurred from
1979-1999, so that it was actually inside the orbit of
Neptune’s, the next closest planet. This made Neptune, for a
period of twenty years, the furthest planet from the sun.

This phenomenon is due to the fact that Pluto’s orbit is an
oval, and Neptune’s is circular. In Pluto’s 248 year circuit of
the sun, the inside of the oval is marginally closer to the sun
than Neptune’s circular pattern.


True Story 2.   

I’m not lovi’n it


The capital of Vermont, Montpelier is the only state capital in
the United States that does not have a McDonalds.
Vermont is one of those beautiful, northeastern states where you
can enjoy the changing seasons and all that goes with them,
along with some of the local history and things peculiar to the

Although it stands on its own now, Vermont was once a bone of
contention between New Hampshire and New York, but finally
slipped out of the fray by obtaining statehood in 1791. In fact,
it was the first state admitted to the Union after the
Constitution was ratified.

It has really boomed since those early days, with many high
profile businesses including Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream, who are
not the biggest employers as some may think. That honor belongs
to IBM. On the other hand, some things have taken a while to
catch on. There was no Wal-Mart in the entire state, until 1996.

Not to say that there aren’t some shining highlights, here and
there. For example, in Montpelier is one of the few state
capitol buildings to have a gold dome. The city also claims the
distinction of the country’s smallest state capitol, with a
population of only 9,000. In Vermont, you are required to a have
a photo I.D. license, which are only issued in Montpelier. The
catch is: you have to drive there to get one.

Vermont is a great place to eat, too. Spring heralds the flow of
maple syrup in Montpelier, the biggest producers in the U.S.
There’s also the famous Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream, where the
‘waste’ products are given to local farmers to feed their hogs.
It’s reported that the porkers don’t care for the mint Oreo
flavor. But if you want a burger, you best eat at home.
Montpelier is also the only state capitol without a McDonald’s


Apparently a true story

 US Marine Corps General Reinwald was interviewed on the radio concerning guns and children.

This is a portion of an American National Public Radio (NPR) interview between a female interviewer and US Marine Corps General Reinwald who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his military installation:

FEMALE INTERVIEWER: So, General Reinwald, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base?

GENERAL REINWALD: We’re going to teach the Boy Scouts climbing, canoeing, archery and shooting.

FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Shooting! That’s a bit irresponsible, isn’t it?

GENERAL REINWALD: I don’t see why, they’ll be properly supervised on the rifle range.

FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Don’t you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?

GENERAL REINWALD: I don’t see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm.

FEMALE INTERVIEWER: But you’re equipping them to become violent killers.

GENERAL REINWALD: Well, you’re equipped to be a prostitute, but you’re not one, are you?

The radio went silent and the interview ended.

Footnote – Confession time

The saga of General Reinwald is an urban myth.  Internet archaeologists have traced this funny back to a Welsh broadcast with a scout master in 1997.  As with all good stories, in the intervening years it has been adapted and Americanised.





A man and a woman go to the carnival every year. Every time the
man says, ‘Anna can we ride them airplanes that goes up for a
couple of minutes then comes back down?’

The woman always replied by saying,’We don`t need to spend any
extra money on them airplanes,its to expensive.Ten dollars is
ten dollars.

Tom, the pilot, said,’ Larry, every year I hear you say you want
to ride my airplanes, and every year Anna says it`s too
expensive. I`ll make you a deal, if I do all of my flips and
tricks with you in there with me, and you don`t say one word,
I`ll give you the ride for free.

Anna and Larry discussed it and decided they would take the
deal.They got up in the air and Tom did all of his tricks and

Tom said,’Larry I just knew you`d say something on that first
flip,but you didn`t!

Larry replied,’ i was going to say something when Anna fell out,
but ten dollars is ten dollars.



The Nephew

Billy Bob’s pregnant sister was in a terrible car accident and
went into a deep coma. After being in the coma for nearly
months, she wakes up and sees that she is no longer pregnant.
Frantically, she asks the doctor about her baby.

The doctor replies, ‘Ma’am, you had twins! A boy and a girl. The
babies are fine and your brother came in and named them.’

The woman thinks to herself, ‘Oh no, not my brother… he’s an
idiot redneck!’ Expecting the worst, she asks the doctor, ‘Well, what’s
the girl’s name?’

‘Denise,’ says the doctor.

The new mother says, ‘Wow, that’s a beautiful name! I guess I
was wrong about my brother. I like Denise.’ Then she asks,
‘What’s the boy’s name?’


 Some of Oscar Wilde’s many Quips

There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written.

But what is the difference between literature and journalism?
Journalism is unreadable and literature is not read.  That is all.

We have really everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language

America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between.

A pompous speaker who had a great opinion of himself gave a long after-dinner speech.  He then made the mistake of turning to his neighbour on the top table, who happened to be Oscar Wilde, and asked, ‘How would you have delivered that speech?’ Under an assumed name’, came the reply from Oscar Wilde.

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination

There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating: people who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing.

To lose one parent, Mr Worthing, may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars

An idea that is not dangerous is unworthy of being called an idea at all. Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught

The basis of optimism is sheer terror.

Genius is born – not paid.

If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they’ll kill you.

‘One can always be kind to people about whom one cares nothing.’

The only thing that sustains one through life is the consciousness of the immense inferiority of everybody else and this is a feeling that I have always cultivated.

To get back my youth I would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or be respectable.

Disobedience, in the eyes of anyone who has read history, is man’s original virtue. It is through disobedience and rebellion that progress has been made.

I was working on the proof of one of my poems all the morning, and took out a comma. In the afternoon I put it back again.

There is no sin except stupidity.

 Thief and the Parrot

Late one night, a burglar broke into a house that he thought was empty. He stealthily crept through the lounge and was stopped dead in his tracks when he heard a loud voice clearly saying, ‘Jesus is watching you!’

Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward again.

‘Jesus is watching you,’ the voice rang out again.

The thief stopped dead again. He was frightened out of his wits. Frantically, he looked all around. In a dark corner, he spotted a birdcage and in the cage was a parrot

He asked the parrot, ‘Was that you who said Jesus is watching me?’

‘Yes,’ said the parrot.

The burglar breathed a heavy sigh of relief and asked the parrot: ‘What’s your name?’

‘Ronald,’ said the bird.

‘That’s a stupid name for a parrot,’ sneered the burglar. ‘What idiot named you Ronald?’

The parrot said, ‘The same idiot who named the rottweiller Jesus.’

 The Buffalo Thory


One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory
to his buddy Norm.

Here’s how it  went:

‘Well ya see , Norm, it’s like this… A herd of buffalo can only
move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is
the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first.
This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general
speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing
of the weakest members.  In much the same way, the human brain can
only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells.  Excessive intake
of  alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells.  But naturally, it
attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.  In this way, regular
consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain
a faster and more efficient machine.  That’s why you always feel smarter
after a few beers.’ Thanks to Leo.